Mary Barra | Duke Commencement Speaker 2022

The commencement speech, delivered by an unnamed speaker at Duke University's 2022 graduation, emphasizes the importance of family, hard work, empathy, integrity, and inclusivity. Drawing from personal experiences, the speaker shares five life lessons learned at the family kitchen table: always do your best, find your purpose, listen to understand, be honest, and include one more person. The speaker highlights the significance of these values in leadership and personal growth, encouraging graduates to create their own supportive communities and to strive for a positive impact in the world.

• The speaker expresses gratitude to President Price and acknowledges the hard work behind the event's preparation.
• She congratulates the Duke University Class of 2022 and shares her personal connection as a mother of two Duke graduates.
• The speaker humorously mentions her apprehension about speaking after John Legend, assuring the audience she won't sing.

"Well, thank you, President Price. And to everyone who has worked behind the scenes preparing for this special day."

• The speaker acknowledges the efforts of those who organized the commencement event.

"Congratulations to each and every one of you. As the proud mom of two recent Duke graduates, I have sat in the audience for commencement twice before, including last year, when John Legend was here."

• She congratulates the graduates and shares her personal experience as a parent at previous commencements.

• The speaker emphasizes the significance of family, starting with her own family's history and values.
• Her mother grew up during the Depression in a large family; her father served in World War Two and worked at General Motors.
• The speaker highlights the belief in the American dream instilled by her parents, emphasizing hard work, education, and self-belief.

"My story starts with my family because family means so much to me. My mom came from a large family with eight kids and grew up on a farm in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan."

• She stresses the importance of family in shaping her values and identity.

"They both believed in the American dream. That if you worked hard enough, got yourself an education, believed in yourself, you could achieve anything."

• The speaker underscores the values of hard work and education as pathways to success.

• The speaker shares memories from her childhood, particularly conversations at the kitchen table, which were formative in her life.
• She identifies five key lessons learned at the kitchen table: do your best, find your purpose, listen to understand, be honest always, and include one more.

"When I think about growing up, many of my memories are from our kitchen table. It was a brown Formica table with four chairs."

• The kitchen table is depicted as a central place for learning and conversation in her family.

"I would like to share five lessons. One: do your best. Two: find your purpose. Three: listen to understand. Fourth: be honest always. And fifth: include one more."

• The speaker introduces the five lessons that have been fundamental to her personal and professional life.

• The speaker reflects on the enduring relevance of the lessons learned from her family and kitchen table conversations.
• She emphasizes the importance of these lessons in shaping her as a person, wife, mother, friend, and leader.

"I've learned time and again how fundamental these lessons have been and continue to be."

• The speaker concludes by reaffirming the significance of the lessons in her ongoing personal and professional development.

• Emphasizes the importance of hard work over talent, stating that while talent provides a head start, it is insufficient without dedication and effort.
• Shares a personal anecdote of being a non-athletic, academically inclined individual, highlighting the value of effort and persistence despite initial shortcomings.
• Encourages individuals to engage actively, contribute, and help others as a means of achieving personal and professional success.

"But while talent gives you a head start, it's not nearly enough to win. You need more. And I've learned that one important trait that distinguishes those who truly excel in life is hard work."

• Highlights the belief that hard work is a critical factor in achieving excellence, surpassing even natural talent.

"After a test, I would worry that I didn't do well. And my mom would always ask me, 'Did you do the best you could?' And I would say, 'yes.' And then she would say, 'That's all that matters.'"

• Illustrates the importance of effort and doing one's best, regardless of the outcome, as a measure of success.

"I've always been a big believer in the expression hard work beats talent if talent doesn't work hard."

• Reinforces the idea that consistent effort and dedication can outperform innate talent that lacks hard work.

• Discusses the significance of finding one's purpose in life, particularly through career experiences and personal growth.
• Describes a career journey at General Motors, starting as a co-op student and evolving through various roles, highlighting the value of diverse experiences.
• Emphasizes the development of empathy and understanding as crucial leadership qualities gained through interactions with colleagues.

"I have been at General Motors my entire career. And it's been said when I was 18, I started as a co-op student, meaning I would work for three months and go to school three months."

• Reflects on the long-term commitment to a career path and the foundational experiences gained through early work opportunities.

"Working on an assembly line is hard work. And the people who do it are talented."

• Acknowledges the skill and effort required in various roles, underscoring the respect for colleagues' contributions.

"Empathy. It's the ability to share and understand the feelings of one another, and it's foundational to any form of leadership."

• Highlights empathy as a core leadership trait, essential for effective management and understanding of team dynamics.

"I slowly started to connect with my purpose, and I realized I had a role to play with people to help them be their best selves."

• Describes the personal journey of discovering one's purpose, focusing on fostering the potential of others and contributing to organizational success.

• Purpose is crucial for guiding personal and professional decisions. It acts as a "North Star" to navigate life's challenges.
• Understanding one's purpose provides clarity and motivation, especially during difficult times.
• Even if one's life purpose is not yet defined, actively seeking it can prevent aimless wandering.

"Purpose is the answer to why. Always ask yourself why. It's a simple question, and being honest with yourself will help you navigate big decisions and small ones."

• The quote underscores the importance of purpose as a guiding question that can simplify decision-making and provide clarity.

• True listening involves understanding others' perspectives, not just preparing to respond or defend one's own viewpoint.
• Respecting different points of view is a key outcome of listening to understand.
• The speaker shares a personal experience from General Motors, highlighting the consequences of not listening and understanding the significance of a vacation policy to employees.

"Listening is foundational to everything. And not just listening to respond or defend. But truly listening to understand."

• This quote emphasizes the foundational role of listening in understanding and respecting diverse perspectives.

"What made it wrong was that I didn't understand. I didn't listen to my team. And so I didn't understand how important these days were."

• The quote illustrates a personal failure to listen, leading to a lack of understanding of employees' needs and the subsequent reversal of a policy decision.

• Being honest involves acknowledging and owning mistakes rather than avoiding responsibility.
• Owning mistakes is a learning opportunity and can be empowering, as it often aligns with others' awareness of the error.
• Honesty also entails expressing one's ideas and perspectives, rather than passively waiting for others to speak up.

"You will make mistakes. You will mess up. Will you run? Will you look the other way? Will you hope they blame someone else or will you own it?"

• The quote challenges individuals to take responsibility for their actions, highlighting the importance of honesty and accountability.

"I've actually found it empowering to admit a mistake. And after all, quite often most people around, you know, you already made the mistake."

• This quote suggests that admitting mistakes is often liberating and aligns with the reality that others are usually aware of the error, encouraging a culture of transparency and learning.

• Integrity is a fundamental personal value that requires years to build but can be destroyed in an instant.
• Maintaining integrity involves doing what you say you will do and assuming goodness in others.
• Winning without integrity equates to not truly winning.

"Your integrity is everything. It takes years to build, and it can crumble in a moment. And when it's gone, it's almost impossible to get back."

• Integrity is a fragile yet essential quality that defines personal and professional relationships.

"Do what you say you're going to do. And always remember that if you win without integrity, you really haven't won."

• True success is defined by maintaining integrity in actions and outcomes.

• Inclusivity involves creating space for others at the table, both literally and figuratively.
• The speaker reflects on personal experiences with family, highlighting the value of inclusion.
• The act of including others fosters community, conversation, and shared experiences.

"Include one more. Make room at the table. Like I said, it wasn't just my mom, my dad, my brother and I at the table. More often than not, family or friends would drop by after school or work."

• Including others is a practiced value that enhances community and strengthens relationships.

"There's always room for one more. Everyone was included. And that's what Tony and I have tried to do for our children. And that's what I try to do professionally as well."

• Inclusion is a guiding principle in both personal life and professional practice, promoting a sense of belonging.

• Shared experiences, such as family meals, create lasting memories and bonds.
• These experiences are less about the material aspects and more about the emotional connections formed.

"When you were at my house, you were going to talk. People were going to listen, you were going to laugh for sure. And you might even cry either from sadness or happiness, and you would be fed even if it was a tuna sandwich."

• The value of shared experiences lies in the emotional and relational connections they foster, rather than the physical offerings.

• Despite the challenges in the world, there are significant reasons for hope, particularly in the progress of inclusion.
• The next generation is seen as a driving force for challenging assumptions and pushing for better practices.

"You know, there's a lot that's not right in the world. Plenty to be worried about. But there are also so many reasons for hope. And I think the collective conversation and progress we're making on the power of inclusion is a huge cause for hope."

• Progress in inclusion is a hopeful sign, driven by new leaders who challenge the status quo and advocate for change.

• The speaker emphasizes the importance of finding one's community and creating personal spaces of wisdom and support.
• Gratitude towards those who support and ground you is essential for personal growth.

"Whatever path you choose, you will have opportunity. When that opportunity comes, what will you do with it? Will you give of yourself? Will you protect what needs protecting? Will you leave this world a little better than you found it?"

• Future opportunities should be approached with a mindset of contribution and protection of values.

"So find your people. Create your own kitchen table. Discover your own wisdom. And as you celebrate. Please thank the people who have cheered you on. They will keep you grounded and focused on what's truly important in life."

• Building a supportive community and expressing gratitude are key components of achieving and maintaining personal success.