In this candid episode, the host reflects on the misguided pursuit of passion and purpose, advocating for the power of negative emotions as a driving force in achieving success. He shares his personal journey from an angry teenager to a successful entrepreneur, emphasizing that progress comes from action, not the search for happiness. The host debunks the myth that passion is necessary for wealth, revealing that the most successful individuals often use pain and anger as motivation. He encourages embracing the 'dark side' as a catalyst for hard work and argues that negative experiences can be transformed into positive outcomes. His ultimate message is that you don't have to love every aspect of what you do; you just need to harness whatever emotions fuel you to push through and do what's required to succeed.
When I was 1516 1718 years old, I was a pretty angry kid. And I thought that I had all these issues. I would tell people I have these issues, I have anger issues. I am not a nice person.
Speaker A describes their self-perception during adolescence, marked by anger and self-identified personal issues.
And in college it's all propaganda of people who are teaching, who've never actually done real work in a real economy, ever. They're all tenured. They don't live in reality. And they tell everyone they should pursue their purpose and their passion and the things that they love.
Speaker A criticizes the college environment and the advice given by professors who they feel are disconnected from real-world experiences, pushing the narrative of pursuing passion and purpose.
You can embrace the fact that you are angry. You can embrace the fact that you feel like you are in pain. And you can use that to make the life that you want.
Speaker A suggests that accepting and using negative emotions can be a powerful tool in shaping one's life.
But half of your life is below average by definition. And so if you are not using the half of your life as energy or motivation to create the life you want, then you're at a huge disadvantage.
Speaker A posits that since life inherently includes below-average experiences, not using these as motivation is a missed opportunity.
And to give you an example of this, imagine, for example, you have this big vision for your life that you want on this side and on this side your family gets kidnapped, and if you don't do something, they will kill them all. Which of those motivates you more right now? Probably the one with your family getting kidnapped.
Speaker A uses a hypothetical scenario to illustrate how pain and fear can be more compelling motivators than the pursuit of a positive vision.
I saw it as something that I had to overcome, that I didn't have this big purpose. I didn't have this thing that I loved. I didn't have this thing I was passionate about. And if I could have just skipped all of that and started the moment, I accepted that it was okay to be angry and what wasn't
Speaker A reflects on the false belief that they needed to overcome their lack of passion and instead suggests that accepting their anger earlier could have been beneficial.
"They're believing that they have to be happy. They have to have purpose. They have to have passion for what they're doing in order to get out of their situation."
This quote highlights the common belief that one must find joy and passion in their work to be successful, which the speaker refutes.
"You are poor because you're not doing the activities that makes you rich, and you can fuel those activities whatever way you damn well please, period."
The speaker argues that financial success is the result of specific actions, not the emotional state one has while performing them.
"They interviewed the top Olympic medalists, and they found that they don't actually love winning. They hate losing."
This quote supports the idea that aversion to negative outcomes can be a more powerful motivator than the pursuit of positive ones.
"Steve Jobs... was a tough dude to work for. From all accounts of everyone who was around him. But he created something beautiful from that pain, right?"
The speaker uses Steve Jobs as an example of someone who channeled their negative experiences into creating something valuable.
"I have painful experiences in my past and made up experiences in the future that I don't want to go through. And I use those on speed dial in my head whenever I don't want to do something."
This quote reveals the speaker's personal strategy for motivation, which involves recalling negative experiences to propel them forward.
"What fuels me is the feeling I had when I felt stupid in front of the camera because I didn't prepare, I didn't do the work."
Here, the speaker explains how the memory of a specific negative experience serves as a more effective motivator than positive intentions.
"The only ask that I can ever have of you guys is that you help me spread the word so we can help more entrepreneurs ma"
The speaker makes a direct appeal to the audience for support in disseminating their message, emphasizing the goal of aiding entrepreneurs.
"And the only way we do that is if you can rate and review and share this podcast. So the single thing that I ask you to do is you can just leave a review."
This quote is a call to action for listeners to engage with the podcast by leaving a review, which the speaker believes is crucial for the podcast's growth and success.
"I spent so long trying to get the right motivation, the right energy to do what I was supposed to do, rather than accept the energy that I had overflowing from me, which was pain."
The speaker reflects on their past struggles with finding motivation and how they learned to channel their pain into a driving force for their actions.
"But the thing is, you can use the negative motivator that you have now to get through the periods of suck because the pain that you experience sucked more than the suck that you have in front of you, the work that must be done."
This quote describes how the speaker used their pain as a negative motivator to push through difficult tasks, ultimately leading to improvement and enjoyment in their work.
"The big vision for Alex's life until maybe four years ago was don't be broke. That was the big vision for my life."
The speaker shares their past primary goal, which was to escape financial hardship, highlighting the evolution of their personal vision over time.
"Like there is no feeling I enjoy. That makes me more sick than the idea that I could have done more."
The speaker conveys their intense dislike for the feeling of not having given their all to a task, which serves as a powerful motivator for them.
"Though the book that I made last year sold two times more than half the fucking books, New York Times. I know that it pisses me off, but you know what pisses me off more? The idea that the next book that I launch, people say, you know what? I liked his first book a little better."
This quote reflects the speaker's concern about their audience's perception of their work and the pressure to surpass previous achievements.
"But the pain of the idea of that book not doing well or that book leading to people being like, I don't think he tried as hard. That is the thing that hurts so much more than going from the top yet again to make another video, to make another article, to make another short, to make another fucking chapter revision yet again to make it better."
The speaker is motivated by the fear of being perceived as not trying hard enough, which drives them to continually revise and improve their work.
"And the difference between what your best is and what is required is the difference between what you think your real best is and what your actual best is. And there's a fucking ocean between those things and what your actual best is, is the thing that you would do to prevent everyone you know from dying."
This quote highlights the disparity between perceived effort and the extreme lengths one could go to when the stakes are highest, urging the recognition of one's true capacity for effort.
"Because the road to hell is not paved with good intentions. What people care about is the outcome people care about what you put out in the world now, why you do it, what fuels you, is purely internal to you."
This quote suggests that intentions are less significant than the actual results of one's work, emphasizing the importance of focusing on producing tangible outcomes.
"So the thing that got me through it was realizing that I hated my current circumstance. And I hated the idea of my dad being right. And I hated the idea of people saying, I can't believe he quit his job to do some stupid thing and not win."
The speaker uses their hatred for their previous situation and the prospect of others' doubt as fuel to drive their relentless work ethic and refusal to accept failure.
"But the idea of failing was so much more painful for me that I was able to embrace the suck faster."
This quote conveys the speaker's willingness to endure hardship and discomfort to avoid the greater pain of failing to achieve their goals.