Leveling Up Why We Get Stuck Ep 163



In a detailed discussion on personal growth and business success, the host and guest Layla explore the concept of skill stacking and the importance of character traits in achieving higher levels of success. They emphasize that while acquiring skills is crucial for initial growth and breaking through barriers, evolving one's character traits such as focus, patience, and consistency is essential for sustained progress and leadership. The host shares personal anecdotes to illustrate how businesses often fail due to a lack of focus rather than a lack of opportunity, and how the discipline to say no to tempting opportunities is a character trait that must be honed. They also touch upon the idea that proficiency in skills is just the starting point; deepening those skills and complementing them with strong character traits is what truly amplifies one's capabilities and leads to long-term success.

Summary Notes

Introduction to Skill Stacking and Character Traits

  • Speaker A opens with a reflection on a recent series of events and anticipates sharing content related to leveling up and skill stacking.
  • The concept of skill stacking is linked to John Wooden's pyramid of success, which lists traits that foster success.
  • Speaker A emphasizes the importance of recognizing deficiencies in skills as a way to take control of personal growth.

"One that I woke up today thinking about was about leveling up. And so one of the biggest, most successful podcasts I had recently was skill stacking, right?"

This quote introduces the topic of skill stacking as a method for personal and professional development, highlighting its significance in Speaker A's recent successful podcast.

"It's John Wooden's pyramid of success. And his entire pyramid is a series of traits that will create success, right, that engender a successful person."

Speaker A references John Wooden's pyramid of success to illustrate the point that success is built upon a foundation of various traits.

The Role of Skills in Growth and Success

  • Speaker A and Speaker B agree that acquiring skills is essential for growth.
  • The lack of growth is framed as a deficiency in skills, which can be addressed and improved upon.
  • Acquiring new skills leads to significant improvements in business, such as lead generation, sales, and high-ticket selling.

"Skills, and you always have to frame your lack of growth in terms of a deficiency or a deficit or a lack of skills so that you can then be in control of fixing it, right?"

This quote highlights the proactive approach of framing growth challenges as skill deficiencies, which allows for taking control and addressing the issues directly.

Beyond Skills: The Importance of Character Traits

  • Speaker A distinguishes between skills and character traits, suggesting that success at higher levels involves both.
  • Focus and patience are identified as key attributes that Speaker A needed to develop.
  • Speaker A shares personal experiences of overextending in business and the importance of focus.

"But what happens next? And this is where people get stuck is that the next level is not necessarily skills. Sometimes it's skills in addition to character traits. Attributes, right."

Speaker A points out that after acquiring certain skills, further advancement requires the development of character traits and attributes.

Focus as a Crucial Attribute for Entrepreneurs

  • Businesses fail more often from taking on too much rather than from a lack of opportunities.
  • The ability to say no and maintain focus is described as a character trait rather than a skill.
  • Opportunities increase with success, making focus even more important.

"Businesses do not die from starvation. They don't die from not having enough. They die because the entrepreneur takes on too much."

This quote explains that overextension and a lack of focus can be detrimental to businesses, emphasizing the need for entrepreneurs to be selective and disciplined.

Leadership and Inspirational Character Traits

  • Leadership is discussed as a combination of skills and character traits that inspire others to follow.
  • Speaker A argues that leadership involves embodying traits that others aspire to, such as commitment and care.
  • The impact of an individual's character on their ability to lead effectively is highlighted.

"Leadership, a lot of times, is acquiring a number of inspirational character traits that other people will look up to you for so that they're willing to follow you."

Speaker A describes leadership as a blend of skills and character traits that motivate others to follow, suggesting that leadership extends beyond mere technical abilities.

Self-Reflection and Impact on Others

  • Speaker A humorously points out the need for self-awareness when facing challenges with employees.
  • The belief that employees are the problem is identified as a harmful mindset.
  • The importance of embodying the traits one expects from others is underscored.

"But I was saying, some of you meet each other, and we're like, well, dude, have you met you? Like, duh."

Speaker A emphasizes the need for self-reflection and the recognition that one's own character can affect interactions with employees and others.

Conclusion: Tactical Skills and Character Development

  • Speaker A concludes by stressing the importance of both tactical skills and character development.
  • The discussion suggests that a balance of skills and character traits is necessary for breaking through to higher levels of success.

"And so consistently thinking about that in terms of, like, okay, sure. Here are the tactical skills I need."

This final quote from Speaker A reiterates the ongoing process of identifying necessary skills and character traits for personal and professional advancement.

Acquiring Skills and Traits for Business Success

  • Understanding the need to learn various skills for business, such as writing copy, creating headlines, and nurturing leads.
  • Recognizing the importance of character traits like focus, consistency, and patience for executing skills.
  • The process of learning begins with acquiring a variety of skills and then deepening those skills.
  • The transition from learning skills to developing character traits that ensure consistent execution of those skills.
  • The concept of improving skills beyond minimum proficiency to achieve excellence.
  • The challenge of staying focused and not being distracted by new opportunities, described metaphorically as the "woman in the red dress."

"I need to learn how to write copy. I need to have it creative. I need to have headlines. I need to know how to create a on. I need how to get people to opt in. I need to know how to nurture leads. I need to know how to work that in total number of outreach attempts."

This quote highlights the specific skills necessary for business success, including marketing and lead management.

"Consistency is not a skill, it's a character trait, right? And a lot of people don't have that character trait associated with actions and the skills that you do in business, right?"

This emphasizes that consistency is a character trait, not just a skill, and is essential for applying business skills effectively.

"Getting people to say, yes, is a skill set of sales, but that would mean knowing how to build rapport, knowing how to manage your energy, knowing how to manage your head state, right?"

Sales is identified as a skill set that encompasses various sub-skills such as rapport building, energy management, and mindset control.

"So in the beginning, you're learning lots of new skills, right? You're trying to build the steps of the bridge, the bricks of the bridge across the barrier, so that you start getting the flow of money that start going your way."

The initial phase of business involves learning multiple skills to build a foundation for revenue generation.

"And then after that, you're deepening the skills, right. You're getting better at those skills. So instead of thinking more in terms of variety, it's more in terms of depth, which is kind of like the next level, right?"

After acquiring a variety of skills, the focus shifts to deepening and improving those skills for better performance.

"It's not like you check the box and say, I know how to write headlines. Well, gee whiz, you can get better at writing headlines. You can get better at writing copy."

This asserts that there is always room for improvement in any skill, and one should strive for greater mastery rather than settling for basic proficiency.

"And typically, that comes through consistent execution and repetition, which means that it takes the character traits of focus and determination and drive and being able to be consistent and not go away and start looking at shiny objects."

Consistent practice and repetition are necessary to improve skills, which requires focus, determination, and the ability to resist distractions.

"And what's crazy about this is that the higher up you go, the more seductive the woman in the red dress looks like. And I'm saying that from Matrix is my all time favorite movie, the woman in the red dress."

This metaphor from "The Matrix" is used to describe how opportunities can be increasingly distracting as one progresses in their career, emphasizing the need for focus and discernment.

Discipline in Business Opportunities

  • Speaker A reflects on their past experience with discipline when starting their gyms.
  • They mention how they had to say no to certain opportunities to maintain focus.
  • Speaker A discusses the importance of discipline at different levels of success.

"I thought that I was having discipline in saying no to a certain level of opportunity when I was starting my gyms."

This quote illustrates Speaker A's belief that they were exercising discipline by rejecting some opportunities when starting their business, which was crucial for their success.

Developing Business Discipline

  • Speaker A had to develop a new level of discipline as their business grew.
  • They delayed starting a supplement company to focus on their gym business.
  • This decision contributed to the gym's explosive growth.

"I need to develop a new level discipline because there's more things that I want to do that I have to not be able to do right."

Speaker A acknowledges the need to develop greater discipline as the business expands and more opportunities arise, understanding that not all opportunities can be pursued simultaneously.

Strategic Focus in Business

  • Speaker A credits their partner, Layla, for advising against starting a supplement company simultaneously with the gym.
  • They express uncertainty about whether they would make the same decisions again.

"Layla, the angel that she is, was like, no, that's stupid. Don't do that."

This quote shows how Layla played a critical role in advising Speaker A to stay focused on one venture, which led to the gym's success.

Financial Success and Community Impact

  • Speaker A discusses the financial success of their business, mentioning the significant commissions paid out to partners.
  • They express fulfillment in being able to give back to the community.

"Now we write a check for $600,000 every single month to our gym lords in terms of commission checks. So that's real money that I get to send back to the community."

Speaker A highlights the tangible financial impact of their business success on their community, indicating a sense of responsibility and fulfillment.

Reflection on Past Decisions

  • Speaker A reflects on the allure of new opportunities as their business grew.
  • They admit to a deficiency in their skill set and character trait of staying focused.

"I wasn't able to say no to her that opportunity later on as I was in the beginning. And that was a deficiency in my skill set at the time, my character trait of staying focused."

This quote shows Speaker A's self-awareness about their past inability to maintain focus when faced with new opportunities, recognizing it as a personal shortcoming.

The Process of Skill Acquisition

  • Speaker A talks about the process of becoming proficient in new skills, emphasizing that it doesn't take a lot of time.
  • They encourage trying and learning from failure as a key part of the learning process.

"Most proficient skills only take not a lot of time. Like, you can google how to do x, and if you consume for, like, 2 hours of information, you'll probably be proficient."

Speaker A emphasizes the accessibility of information and the relatively short time it takes to become proficient in a new skill, encouraging listeners to take the initiative to learn.

The Importance of Repetition and Resilience

  • Speaker A stresses the need for repetition and resilience in deepening skills.
  • They highlight the importance of getting 'punched in the face' and persevering as a way to amplify skills.

"You have to do repetition and being willing to get punched in the face over and over and over again so that you can deepen those skills."

This quote underscores the idea that repetition and resilience are essential for skill development, suggesting that overcoming challenges is a part of growth.

Character Traits for Long-Term Success

  • Speaker A discusses the importance of strong character traits to stay the course in business.
  • They reference Angela Duckworth's book "Grit" and the concept of 'stick-to-itiveness'.

"The biggest thing in the book by Angela Duckworth called Grit, which is really interesting, is that the people who are most successful in life just stick with it."

Speaker A cites the concept of 'grit' from Angela Duckworth's work, highlighting the importance of perseverance for achieving long-term success.

Entrepreneurial Pitfalls

  • Speaker A points out the tendency of entrepreneurs to chase after new, shiny opportunities.
  • They suggest that this lack of focus can prevent entrepreneurs from achieving success.

"Shiny object. Shiny object. Shiny object. They're jumping from opportunity to opportunity, and they never"

This incomplete quote implies that entrepreneurs often get distracted by new opportunities, which can lead to a lack of progress in their primary venture.

Key Theme: Focusing on One Venture for Success

  • It's important to concentrate on a single business or venture to achieve significant success.
  • Trying to manage multiple businesses simultaneously can lead to being spread too thin and hinder the potential for success in any one area.
  • Focusing allows for the deepening of skills and amplification of success in a chosen field.

You can be successful at anything you want, just not everything you want.

This quote encapsulates the idea that success requires focus and dedication to a single path rather than attempting to achieve in multiple areas simultaneously.

Each one of those businesses can be a billion dollar business. You can be a billion dollar roofing company. You can be a billion dollar flipping homes company. You can be a billion dollar general contractor.

This quote highlights the potential for great success in any one business if given the proper attention and resources, rather than dividing efforts among multiple businesses.

There's a fallacy that we tell ourselves as entrepreneurs, which is that if I do more things, I will make more money, when, in fact, I need to do fewer things to get to where I want to go.

The speaker is debunking a common misconception among entrepreneurs that diversifying efforts leads to greater profits, emphasizing instead the importance of focus.

Key Theme: The Necessity of Character Traits for Skill Amplification

  • Proficiency in a skill is only the starting point; amplifying and deepening skills require character traits like patience, focus, and the ability to say no.
  • It takes years of dedication and repetition to reach new levels of proficiency and breakthrough in skill development.
  • The analogy of fitness is used to illustrate the concept of a minimum effective dose and the effort required to truly advance and improve.

And so once you acquire the skill set, once you become proficient, then you amplify the skills that you have by deepening them.

This quote explains the progression from acquiring a skill to amplifying it through focused effort and character development.

Because when you are developing a skill, let me give you an example to tie this as an analogy for fitness.

The speaker uses fitness as an analogy to explain the concept of skill development, comparing the effort to maintain versus the effort to build muscle with the effort to maintain versus improve a skill.

Key Theme: Overcoming Plateaus in Skill and Income

  • Stagnation in income is often a sign that one's skill set has not improved.
  • To increase income and advance in one's field, it is necessary to deepen existing skills.
  • The process of leveling up changes over time; it begins with improving skills but later involves changing character traits.

If your level of income has stayed the same for a period of years, that means your skill set has stayed the same.

This quote suggests a direct correlation between income levels and skill set development, implying that no improvement in skills leads to no increase in income.

Leveling up, why we get stuck. And it's because the things that you need to improve on are different.

The speaker discusses the evolution of personal development, indicating that the areas in need of improvement shift from skills to character traits as one progresses, which can cause people to get stuck if they don't realize this change.

Key Theme: The Skill of Doing Less to Achieve More

  • Sometimes the necessary skill to reach the next level is the ability to do less and focus more.
  • Removing constraints and unnecessary tasks can lead to greater success and progression.
  • Maintaining the course and resisting the temptation to take on more can be a critical skill in itself.

Sometimes the skill itself is to not do other things.

This quote emphasizes the value of restraint and the strategic choice to avoid taking on additional tasks in order to excel in a chosen area.

That is the thing that you need to do to get to the next level is to do less, and it's remove constraints.

The speaker is advocating for a reduction in activities and the elimination of constraints as a strategy for leveling up and achieving greater success.

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