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Summary Notes


In this episode of the Swifty podcast, hosts Rachel and Bethany delve into Taylor Swift's relationship with ex-boyfriend Joe Alwyn and the speculation surrounding her upcoming album "Tortured Poet's Department." They discuss the personal and artistic influences on Swift's work, including her friends' divorces, past relationships, and the impact of her own romantic experiences. The conversation touches on the couple's decision to keep their relationship private, the dynamic of their breakup, and how Swift's music often serves as a reflection and timestamp of her personal life. The hosts aim to provide Swifties with context for understanding potential references in the new album, hypothesizing that it will heavily feature songs about the breakup, similar to Swift's previous works about other exes like Joe Jonas and Harry Styles.

Summary Notes

Taylor Swift's Song "Tolerated"

  • The song "Tolerated" is speculated to be about divorce.
  • Rachel believes it could be referencing her friend Abigail's divorce.
  • The song evokes strong themes of divorce for both speakers.

"I think tolerated is about I have no grounds for this like I don't know it at all. but I think it's because all I know is that I think she's had multiple friends who got divorced. but I know Abigail got divorced oh that's right."

The quote suggests that Rachel is speculating on the meaning behind Taylor Swift's song "Tolerated," connecting it to the experience of a friend's divorce, specifically mentioning Abigail.

Speculation on Taylor Swift's Upcoming Album

  • The upcoming album "Tortured Poet's Department" is speculated to be about Taylor Swift's breakup with Joe Alwyn.
  • Past albums have featured songs about her exes, including Joe Jonas and Harry Styles.
  • The speakers anticipate that the new album will continue this pattern.

"We are all speculating that this is the Joe breakup album. amongst other things but the songs about their breakup are mostly going to be on this as she has done with Joe Jonas and Harry Styles Etc."

The quote indicates the speakers' belief that Taylor Swift's new album will primarily feature songs about her breakup with Joe Alwyn, similar to how previous albums have addressed past relationships.

Taylor Swift's Musical History with Exes

  • Taylor Swift has a history of writing songs about her exes, which become part of her discography.
  • The album "Red" was particularly focused on her relationship with Jake Gyllenhaal.
  • Discussing Swift's exes is seen as a way to understand her personal growth and the context behind her music.

"Joe is probably about to surpass that when tortured po comes out because Joe has a lot of Joe probably is already leading that already because he has so many love songs about him."

The quote conveys the idea that Joe Alwyn may become the ex with the most songs written about him by Taylor Swift, surpassing Jake Gyllenhaal, especially with the release of the speculated breakup album.

Taylor Swift and Joe Alwyn's Relationship

  • Taylor Swift and Joe Alwyn had a private relationship, which was a conscious choice for Swift.
  • The couple's decision to keep their relationship out of the public eye is seen as a positive and necessary step for Swift at that time.
  • There is a suggestion to create a playlist of all the songs about Joe Alwyn for context.

"I think at this point in her life she had gone through reputation like she was currently living it and this was something that she wanted to hide. and I just think that he helped her with I think it is 100% what she needed at the time."

This quote reflects the speakers' view that Taylor Swift's desire for privacy during her relationship with Joe Alwyn was influenced by her experiences during the "Reputation" era and was beneficial for her.

Taylor Swift's Public Image and Relationships

  • Taylor Swift shifted her public image post-"Reputation," focusing more on her work and less on personal relationships.
  • Her relationship with Joe Alwyn became slightly more public over time, with Alwyn co-writing songs under a pseudonym.
  • Swift's approach to relationships has been consistent, supporting her partners and maintaining privacy.

"Gone were the days of Paparazzi photo ops of Swift's days with Tom hson and gooey Instagram photos like the ones she posted with Calvin Harris would no longer populate her social media."

The quote points out the change in Taylor Swift's approach to publicizing her relationships, moving away from the public displays that characterized her past relationships with Tom Hiddleston and Calvin Harris.

The Beginning of Taylor Swift and Joe Alwyn's Relationship

  • The timeline of Taylor Swift and Joe Alwyn's relationship is explored, starting with their meeting at the Met Gala.
  • The speakers discuss the significance of the Met Gala and speculate on the songs that reference their meeting and subsequent events.
  • Swift's attendance at Alwyn's movie screening and a Kings of Leon concert they both attended are highlighted.

"Swift and Owen were dating at this point. it was so under the radar that PR press coverage of the premiere didn't even mention his name."

This quote emphasizes the low-profile nature of the beginning of Taylor Swift and Joe Alwyn's relationship, to the extent that Alwyn was not mentioned in press coverage despite being involved in the events discussed.

Taylor Swift's Privacy and Growth

  • The speakers note that Taylor Swift learned to be more protective of her personal life after the attention from her 1989 tour.
  • Swift's relationship with Joe Alwyn provided a safe space during a tumultuous time in her life.
  • The relationship was kept private, with only close friends and family aware of it for several months.

"After her 1989 tour and all the attention Taylor received, she learned that she had to be more protective of her personal life. and she and Joe decided early on to keep their private life private."

The quote underscores Taylor Swift's decision to maintain privacy in her relationship with Joe Alwyn as a response to the intense public scrutiny she faced during and after her 1989 tour.

Commitment and Growth in Relationships

  • Deciding whether to grow together or part ways is crucial in a relationship.
  • Compromise and understanding are needed when partners want different things.
  • Growth can be positive even if the relationship does not last.

"Like you have to decide that you want to grow together exactly like you are either going to decide that you're parting ways or that you are like committed to making it work."

This quote emphasizes the importance of making a conscious decision about the future of a relationship, whether it means staying together and working through differences or acknowledging that it's time to go separate ways.

Media and Privacy in Relationships

  • The struggle of maintaining privacy in a high-profile relationship is significant.
  • The pressure of media attention can create conflict and stress within the relationship.
  • The desire for privacy can be both a personal need and a protective measure.

"I don't think that job forced her to like keep everything private like we said like I think that is something she really needed at the time."

The speaker suggests that the need for privacy in the relationship was not imposed by external factors but was a personal requirement for one's well-being at the time.

Public Perception and Relationship Dynamics

  • The public often has limited knowledge of celebrity relationships.
  • Past relationships of public figures can be more documented and discussed than current ones.
  • The level of privacy chosen can influence public opinion and speculation.

"But we don't like we don't know like what they went through together really."

This quote highlights the disconnect between the public's perception and the private realities of a high-profile relationship, where much of what the couple experiences remains unknown to outsiders.

Relationship Milestones and Social Media

  • Social media can serve as a platform for relationship announcements.
  • The concept of "Instagram official" moments reflects cultural attitudes toward public relationship declarations.
  • Privacy decisions can impact the way a relationship is perceived and discussed publicly.

"This is the closest they've ever come to an Instagram official moment."

The speaker comments on the significance of a social media post that hints at a relationship without explicitly confirming it, demonstrating how such moments are scrutinized and interpreted by the public.

Discussion of Private Life in Public

  • Individuals in the public eye often face pressure to discuss their private lives.
  • The choice to keep personal details private can be a matter of personal boundaries.
  • Responses to questions about private life can affect public perceptions of the individual.

"I'm aware people want to know about that side of things... but I really prefer to talk about work."

This quote reflects a deliberate choice to maintain a boundary between one's professional life and personal relationships, despite public curiosity.

Artistic Collaboration and Personal Growth

  • Relationships can foster personal and artistic growth.
  • Collaborative creativity can be a significant aspect of a relationship.
  • The support and understanding of a partner can be crucial during times of personal development.

"I think they were like artsy together and stuff like that but probably brought that side out and like almost allowed that to flourish and like kind of nurtured that part of her."

The speaker suggests that the relationship provided a nurturing environment for creative expression and personal development, indicating the positive impact a partner can have on one's artistic journey.

The Balance of Privacy and Publicity

  • Navigating the balance between privacy and publicity is a challenge for public figures.
  • Statements made in interviews can either protect privacy or invite further scrutiny.
  • The tone and wording of responses to personal questions can significantly affect public perception.

"Someone's private life is by definition. private. No one is obligated to share their personal life."

This quote asserts the right to privacy, emphasizing the distinction between what is shared publicly and what is kept private, regardless of public interest.

Privacy and Respect in Relationships

  • Taylor Swift and Joe Alwyn maintain a private relationship, avoiding public discussions about their personal life.
  • Swift supports Alwyn publicly by attending events and promoting his work without discussing their relationship.
  • The couple's approach to privacy is seen as a way to be respectful and show care for one another.

"Swift is supporting him without talking about their relationship in a way that we have not seen him do."

This quote emphasizes Swift's method of supporting Alwyn publicly without directly discussing their private relationship, highlighting their mutual respect for privacy.

Public Appearances

  • Taylor Swift and Joe Alwyn attend events related to their professional work, sometimes separately.
  • Swift attends the "Mary Queen of Scots" movie premiere and an afterparty in London.
  • At the 2019 Golden Globes, they do not walk the red carpet together, but engage in subtle public interactions.

"Swift and Alwyn attend the Golden Globes but separately of course."

This quote notes the couple's attendance at the same event while maintaining their individual professional identities, showcasing their approach to balancing public appearances and private life.

Supportive Actions

  • Swift skips the Grammy Awards to attend a BAFTA afterparty with Alwyn.
  • Their supportive actions are evident in choosing to be present for each other's significant career moments.

"Swift skipped the Grammy's Awards in favor of attending a BAFTA Afterparty with her bow."

This quote illustrates Swift's prioritization of supporting Alwyn's career over her own industry's major event, signifying the depth of their commitment to each other.

Engagement Rumors

  • Engagement rumors circulate as Swift continues to work in London.
  • Friends and sources close to Swift discuss the potential of an engagement, describing Alwyn as her "dream guy."

"Report swirled that getting engaged to Alwyn was not far off."

The quote reflects the public speculation and excitement surrounding the possibility of Swift and Alwyn's engagement, despite no official confirmation from the couple.

Music as a Reflection of Relationship

  • Swift's album "Lover" is analyzed by fans for clues about her relationship with Alwyn.
  • Fans speculate that songs like "Lover" and "Paper Rings" hint at marriage or a deep commitment.

"Once the album dropped fans began dissecting every song for hidden clues about the couple."

This quote captures the intensity of fan engagement with Swift's music, as they seek to understand her personal life through her lyrics.

Relationship Boundaries

  • Swift discusses the importance of setting boundaries around her relationship to maintain manageability.
  • She expresses a willingness to discuss her relationship in private but not for public consumption.

"Our relationship isn't up for discussion."

Swift's quote conveys her clear stance on keeping her relationship with Alwyn private, establishing a boundary between her personal life and public persona.

Relationship Updates

  • Sources close to Swift and Alwyn provide insights into the couple's dynamic, often highlighting Alwyn's supportive nature.
  • Their relationship is described as strong, with both parties valuing privacy.

"Joe's personality is great for Taylor. He's very calm and always very supportive."

This quote from a source close to the couple gives an external perspective on the positive influence Alwyn has on Swift, complementing their decision to keep the relationship out of the public eye.

Shared Moments

  • The couple is occasionally seen in public, such as boarding a private plane or attending events together.
  • These rare sightings contribute to the narrative of their discreet yet strong relationship.

"The couple is photographed on a private plane."

This quote notes one of the few public glimpses into Swift and Alwyn's life together, reinforcing their preference for privacy while acknowledging their connection.

Family and Holidays

  • Swift and Alwyn spend holidays together, including Thanksgiving in London, which is not typically celebrated in the UK.
  • These shared celebrations indicate the integration of their lives and families.

"Swift celebrated Thanksgiving in London with Joe."

The quote highlights the couple's adaptation of cultural traditions to fit their international relationship, showing their commitment to spending time together during significant occasions.

Relationship Challenges and Growth

  • The couple faces challenges and growth opportunities as they navigate their relationship alongside their careers.
  • Conversations about balancing individual success and public attention are speculated to be part of their dynamic.

"They both agree that for their relationship to keep working they want to keep things more quiet."

This quote suggests that Swift and Alwyn have had discussions about how to manage their relationship in the context of their public lives, indicating a mutual understanding and agreement on privacy.

Reflection Through Music

  • Swift's music, including her re-recordings and the album "Midnights," is seen as a reflection of her personal growth and retrospective thoughts on her life and relationships.
  • Fans speculate about the couple's future based on lyrical content and public statements.

"I think her doing her re-records led to 'Midnights' being able to sit some of those songs back in other eras a little bit."

The quote implies that Swift's creative process, including revisiting past work, influences her current music and potentially offers insight into her personal journey and relationship with Alwyn.

Taylor Swift's Re-Recordings and Personal Growth

  • Taylor Swift's re-recordings are reflective of her personal growth and the ability to look back at past versions of herself with a sense of nostalgia and appreciation.
  • The re-recording process and the creation of her album "Midnights" allowed her to recognize that her past experiences, even those negatively viewed by society, were valuable and a part of her identity.
  • These reflections likely sparked conversations about her future plans, including her re-recording schedule and tours.

"I think she probably was able to look back at these other versions of herself like with her re-recordings and be like I kind of miss pieces of that."

The quote expresses the sentiment that revisiting past work through re-recordings can lead to a newfound appreciation for previous stages of one's life and career.

The Challenges of Dating Taylor Swift

  • Dating someone as successful as Taylor Swift presents unique challenges, especially considering societal expectations of men to be recognized and valued.
  • The dynamic of dating someone who is always in the spotlight can be difficult for partners who may feel the need to achieve a similar level of success or recognition.

"Who's basically always going to be more successful than you."

This quote highlights the disparity in success between Taylor Swift and her partners, which can create pressure on the partner to feel equally important or successful.

The Concept of True Love

  • True love is about loving someone in all their forms and through all their "eras."
  • The end of a relationship does not necessarily make someone a villain; it can simply mean that the individuals have recognized they are no longer compatible.
  • Taylor Swift's song "New Year's Day" is referenced as an example of the sentiment that true love is unconditional and supportive in both success and failure.

"To love someone in all forms is that is true love."

This quote captures the essence of true love as accepting and loving a person throughout all the changes and phases of their life.

Reflections Post-Relationship

  • The end of a relationship can provide clarity on what is truly important to an individual.
  • Taylor Swift's breakup allowed her to understand what she values and will not sacrifice in her life and relationships.
  • The importance of family and friends is a core value for Taylor Swift, which she looks for in her partners.

"It has given her so much Clarity on what is important to her and like what she loves and like what she's not going to like sacrifice."

This quote speaks to the personal insights and priorities that can become clear after a relationship ends.

Taylor Swift's Relationships and Public Image

  • Taylor Swift has a history of dating people who share her appreciation for family and friends.
  • The public support of her partners, such as attending movie premieres or award shows, is often minimal and subtle, reflecting the private nature of her relationships.
  • The relationship with Joe Alwyn provided Swift with a sense of normalcy and support during turbulent times in her public image.

"Taylor considers Joe one of the only safe constants in her life."

This quote emphasizes the stability and support Joe Alwyn provided Taylor Swift, particularly when her public image was under scrutiny.

The Evolution of Taylor Swift and Joe Alwyn's Relationship

  • Taylor Swift and Joe Alwyn kept their relationship private, choosing to focus on their happiness away from public input.
  • Their relationship was characterized by mutual support, with Alwyn attending Swift's concerts and being present during significant moments.
  • Speculation about their future, including marriage, arose as they navigated their relationship through the public eye and personal milestones.

"They've talked about marriage so this is co has started happening and they Swift and Owen have talked about their future and marriage."

This quote implies that discussions about a long-term future, including marriage, were part of Taylor Swift and Joe Alwyn's relationship during a period of global uncertainty due to COVID-19.

The Impact of Quarantine on Taylor Swift

  • Quarantine led to a creative outburst for Taylor Swift, resulting in the surprise release of her album "folklore."
  • The album sparked speculation about which songs were inspired by her relationship with Joe Alwyn.
  • The private nature of their relationship continued during quarantine, with social media posts hinting at their life together without revealing too much.

"We loved Co Taylor."

The quote reflects the appreciation for the art and personal growth that Taylor Swift experienced during the COVID-19 quarantine period.

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