Be. Do. Have. Ep 645



In a thought-provoking discussion, the host of a business-focused podcast shares insights on personal development and success. He emphasizes the importance of aligning actions with the identity of the person one aspires to be, rather than just setting goals. Drawing from behavior psychology and referencing James Clear's "Atomic Habits," he suggests that asking oneself, "What would this type of person do?" can drive meaningful change. He argues that both winners and losers set similar goals, but the differentiator lies in the behaviors and activities committed to achieving those goals. By adopting a "what would a billionaire do?" mindset, one can cast votes for the identity they desire, leading to actions that reinforce self-perception and drive success. The host encourages listeners to internalize this approach by making it the chorus of their day, ultimately shaping their identity through consistent, aligned actions.

Summary Notes

Changing Character Traits

  • The simplest way to change undesirable character traits is to act as the person you aspire to be.
  • When faced with a decision, ask yourself what the ideal version of you would do and act accordingly.

"Easiest cue that we can use to change who we are, to change character traits that we find undesirable is to simply ask ourselves when we're confronted with the decision, what would this type of person do? And then act in accordance to that."

This quote emphasizes the technique of envisioning the behavior of the person you want to become in order to guide your actions and decisions.

Building Businesses and Documenting the Journey

  • The speaker is building a business with and wishes that successful entrepreneurs like Bezos, Musk, and Buffett had documented their journeys.
  • The speaker is documenting their journey for others to learn from.

"I'm trying to build a billion dollar thing with I always wish Bezos, Musk, and Buffett had documented their journey. So I'm doing it for the rest of us."

The speaker indicates a desire to build a significant business and expresses regret that other major entrepreneurs didn't document their paths, which motivates them to share their own experiences.

Self-Respect and Entrepreneurial Insights

  • Earning one's own respect is the hardest, and the speaker often receives questions about how to create businesses and live life.
  • A conversation with a friend who had fluctuating financial success provided the speaker with enlightenment on achieving wealth and status.

"The hardest respect to earn is one's own. And I get questions all the time in terms of, like, how do you create these businesses? How do you sell stuff, how do you live your life?"

This quote highlights the challenge of self-respect and the curiosity others have about the speaker's success in business and life.

The Three Elements of Achieving Goals

  • Goals have three elements: the external result, the processes that lead to the result, and being the type of person who engages in those processes.
  • Identifying with certain behaviors or activities is crucial to achieving the desired reward.

"So you have the external result that you're looking for, which might be make more money, get a six pack, whatever you've got the processes, behaviors, activities that result in that goal being achieved, which would be like doing the work. And then the third aspect is being the type of person who does those things."

The speaker outlines the three essential components of goal achievement: the desired outcome, the actions required, and the personal identification with those actions.

Behavior Psychology and Personal Development

  • James Clear's book "Atomic Habits" and other behavior psychologists discuss the importance of aligning behaviors with goals.
  • The 'be-do-have' principle is a common theme in personal development.

"And so I think James Clear talks about this in his book Atomic Habits. But there's a lot of behavior psychologists who've touched on this point, and you probably have heard be-do-have at some point in your personal development journey."

This quote references the influence of behavior psychology in personal development and aligning one's actions with the type of person they wish to become.

The Keystone Habit for Success

  • The speaker shares a keystone habit that has been effective for them, which involves acknowledging a desire and understanding that simply writing down goals is not enough.
  • The speaker suggests that having goals is common among both winners and losers, implying that success depends on more than just goal-setting.

"And so I have this thing that I want externally. And I think I've had enough experience with this to know that simply writing down the goal means nothing."

The speaker challenges the common belief that writing down goals is a significant step toward success, suggesting that it is not the act of setting goals but rather the actions taken toward them that matter.

Understanding Goal-Driven Behaviors

  • Goal achievement is rooted in specific behaviors.
  • Identifying behaviors is closer to what drives progress.
  • Activities that lead to desired results must be known and executed.

And so then you dive a step underneath of that and you look at what are the behaviors that created that goal.

This quote emphasizes the importance of understanding the underlying behaviors that contribute to achieving a goal.

Advertising as a Key Activity for Customer Acquisition

  • The essence of advertising is making products and services known.
  • Activities include private communications (e.g., cold calls, direct messages) and public communications (e.g., social media posts).
  • Increased advertising activities should lead to more customers.

And so if we do activities that make our products and services known, like doing more private communications, which would be one on one reach outs, one on one cold calls, one on one dms, one on one emails, et cetera, prospecting, or one to many.

This quote details different methods of advertising and their role in making products and services known to potential customers.

The Discrepancy between Knowledge and Action

  • People often know what activities they should be doing but fail to act.
  • The speaker wants to address the reasons for inaction and propose solutions.

But the thing is that people will know what that activity is.

This quote highlights the common issue where individuals are aware of what actions are needed but do not follow through with them.

Identity and Decision-Making

  • Identity influences behavior and decision-making.
  • Asking oneself, "What would a wise person do?" can guide actions.
  • Identity is shaped by actions that align with the type of person one aspires to be.

And I think the simplest distillation of that concept is simply asking the question, what would this type of person do?

The speaker suggests that asking oneself how a person with desired traits would act is a simple way to align actions with identity.

The "What Would a Billionaire Do?" Principle

  • Using a refrain or chorus to guide daily decisions can be effective.
  • Asking "What would a billionaire do?" at decision points can shape behavior.
  • This practice helps to reinforce the identity and creates long-lasting change.

And so I tweeted about one and it got shared a zillion times.

This quote suggests that the speaker's simple mental cue for decision-making resonated widely on social media.

Decision-Making Strategies

  • Consider what a significantly smarter person would do in a given situation.
  • The question to ask oneself is akin to "What would a billionaire do?" but should be phrased in a way that resonates personally.

"is what would someone ten times smarter than me do in this situation?"

This quote emphasizes the strategy of imagining a more intelligent or successful version of oneself to guide decision-making.

"And a different way of saying that is, what would a billionaire do? And word it in whatever way that resonates with you."

This quote suggests personalizing the decision-making strategy to what makes sense and motivates the individual.

Identity and Action

  • Using reminders like a post-it can help reinforce the type of person one wants to become.
  • Actions reinforce thoughts and affirmations about oneself.
  • Evidence of the desired identity is created through activity and actions.

"But I think rather than having that big checklist, you can put just a little post it on your computer or wherever you work. That's a reminder to yourself that this is the type of person I want to become."

The quote suggests using simple visual reminders to keep focused on personal development goals.

"Because the whole concept behind affirmations that I do not like, right, which is, I'm a lion, I'm a tiger, I'm a whatever, right? Is that just saying them doesn't make them true?"

The speaker expresses skepticism about affirmations without action, implying that actions are necessary to make affirmations a reality.

The Importance of Evidence in Self-Perception

  • Self-affirmations need to be backed by evidence through actions to be effective.
  • Knowing who one wants to become guides the types of activities one should engage in.
  • The etymology of words can provide insights and change one's perception of them.

"We have to give ourselves evidence that we are this type of person in order to become that."

This quote underlines the importance of actions as proof to oneself of the identity one is trying to adopt.

"And so once we know who we want to become, then that can direct the types of activities that will be in accordance with that."

The speaker emphasizes that understanding one's desired identity can influence the choice of actions to take.

Language, Identity, and Actions

  • Words encapsulate thoughts, and changing speech can change thought patterns.
  • The etymology of the word "philosopher" changed the speaker's perception of the concept.
  • Identity is a repeated beingness, and one's actions become who they are.
  • A simple cue for personal change is to act in accordance with what the desired type of person would do.

"And words matter a lot because they are the things that encapsulate thoughts. And so if you change the way you speak, they change the way you think."

This quote indicates the power of language in shaping thought and, consequently, identity.

"So your actions, what you do, literally becomes who you are. Which means that we can actively change who we are by changing what we do."

The speaker is conveying that consistent actions define identity and that by altering our actions, we can change our identity.

Supporting Entrepreneurship

  • The podcast does not run ads or sell products, relying on word-of-mouth for growth.
  • Listeners are encouraged to rate, review, and share the podcast to support the entrepreneurial community.

"Real quick, guys, you guys already know that I don't run any ads on this, and I don't sell anything. And so the only ask that I can ever have of you guys is that you help me spread the word so we can help more entrepreneurs make more money, feed their families, make better products, and have better experiences for their employees and customers."

The quote is a request for listener support to grow the podcast's reach and impact within the entrepreneurial community.

"It'll take you 10 seconds or one."

"Type of the thumb."

"It would mean the absolute world to me. And more importantly, it may change the."

"World of someone else."

These quotes emphasize the ease of supporting the podcast and the potential significant impact such support could have on others.

Identity-Based Habits and Decision Making

  • Identity shapes daily routines and unexpected decisions.
  • People often fail to predict situations due to numerous variables.
  • Self-perception guides actions and reinforces personal narratives.
  • The "What would Jesus do?" concept illustrates identity-driven actions.
  • Continual self-questioning aligns behavior with desired identity.

"And so I think it's much more useful for us to think about ourselves in terms of, if I were to encompass all of the things that I would like to be right."

This quote emphasizes the importance of defining oneself by aspirational identity rather than by specific actions or goals. It suggests that by focusing on who we want to be, we can guide our decisions and behaviors more effectively.

"And so what I shared with this individual is, I said, what do you want to become? And if it's like, a billionaire, it's like, cool, then what would a billionaire do?"

The speaker illustrates the concept of identity-based decision making by asking an individual to think about their desired identity (e.g., a billionaire) and then to consider the actions that such a person would take.

The Role of Comparison in Self-Perception

  • Personal growth leads to changing benchmarks for comparison.
  • Comparisons can perpetuate feelings of inadequacy.
  • Shifting who we compare ourselves to can be a source of continuous dissatisfaction.

"And what's interesting about this is, as an aside, as you level up in your life, and this is just an observation that I've had, is that you will simply change who you compare yourself to."

The speaker notes that as people progress in life, they tend to compare themselves to different, often more successful individuals, which can lead to a never-ending cycle of feeling inadequate.

The Importance of Activities Over Goals

  • Winners and losers may have the same goals, but their activities differ.
  • Focusing on activities rather than achievements can lead to sustainable success.
  • Writing down identity-based actions can help reinforce internal identity shifts.

"Every winner and every loser have the same goals. What separates them are the activities they commit to."

This quote highlights the distinction between having goals and engaging in the activities that lead to achieving those goals. It suggests that commitment to the right activities is what differentiates successful individuals from unsuccessful ones.

"Instead of writing down your goals, just write down what would a billionaire who lost it all do? Or what would a billionaire do to keep it simple, or whatever version of herself you want to be the doing."

The speaker advises focusing on actions aligned with one's desired identity rather than solely on goal attainment. This approach can lead to a transformation in self-perception and, consequently, to the achievement of goals as a byproduct of identity-based actions.

Reinforcement of Identity Through Daily Practice

  • Writing down desired personal attributes can guide daily decision-making.
  • Reciting one's aspirational identity can help navigate life's crossroads.
  • Borrowing from the "What would Jesus do?" concept can apply to various life scenarios.

"The only tactical ask that I have for you is to simply write down what type of person do I wish to become and then make that the chorus that you recite to yourself when you're at your crossroads."

The speaker suggests a practical exercise of defining and reciting one's desired identity to reinforce decision-making in alignment with that identity, particularly at critical moments of choice.

What others are sharing

Go To Library

Want to Deciphr in private?
- It's completely free

Deciphr Now
Footer background
Crossed lines icon
Crossed lines icon
Crossed lines icon
Crossed lines icon
Crossed lines icon
Crossed lines icon
Crossed lines icon

© 2024 Deciphr

Terms and ConditionsPrivacy Policy