What A Year! | Jeremy George | TEDxYouth@EVHS

The speaker reflects on their pre-pandemic life, revealing a deep sense of emptiness despite outward success. The pandemic and subsequent job loss prompted them to confront their mortality and revisit a neglected bucket list. Inspired by "The Buried Life," they embarked on the "What a Year" project, aiming to complete 52 bucket list items in 52 weeks. This journey, marked by both achievements and failures, rekindled their enthusiasm for life. They emphasize five lessons: confronting mortality, cataloging dreams, leveraging community support, setting clear goals, and celebrating failure, encouraging others to pursue their neglected aspirations.

• The speaker describes a seemingly ideal life in New York City with a great apartment, a recent promotion, global travel, strong friendships, and a loving family.
• Despite outward appearances, the speaker reveals a deep internal unhappiness and a sense of emptiness and meaninglessness.

"Before the pandemic, I thought I was living my best life. I had a great apartment in New York City, had just gotten a promotion at work, I was traveling the world, and plenty of great friends and a loving family. But the truth is I was deeply unhappy."

• The speaker highlights the contrast between external success and internal dissatisfaction.

• The speaker experienced mental health challenges starting in the spring of 2019, marked by spontaneous and intense anxiety episodes.
• These episodes were severe enough to disrupt daily activities, such as needing to get off the subway prematurely.

"Around spring of 2019, I started to really struggle mentally. I remember I'd take the subway to work in the mornings and everything would be totally normal, then seemingly spontaneously my mind would start spiraling out of control."

• The speaker describes the debilitating nature of their mental health struggles and the impact on their daily life.

• Despite appearing happy and social, the speaker was privately grappling with existential questions and feelings of despair.
• The speaker reveals a state of being "passively suicidal," where they were not actively trying to end their life but felt a profound lack of desire to continue living.

"There'd be days I'd be out hanging out with my friends, playing sports, cracking jokes, you know, having a great time. But then by night, I'd be alone in my apartment staring at myself in my bathroom mirror wondering if my life had any meaning."

• The speaker underscores the dichotomy between their public persona and private struggles.

• The pandemic exacerbated the speaker's sense of directionlessness, especially after being laid off from their job.
• The speaker began to ponder deep, existential questions about life and regret.

"And then the pandemic hit, and as we all know, the world went into lockdown. A few months later, along with 20 million other Americans, I was laid off from my job and already feeling completely directionless, I really struggled to look for work."

• The pandemic served as a catalyst for the speaker to confront their existential concerns more directly.

• The speaker reflects on the inevitability of regret at the end of life, particularly regarding unfulfilled aspirations and unattempted endeavors.
• This reflection leads the speaker to revisit a bucket list they had started at the age of 19.

"Instead, I found myself pondering the question, if I were to die tomorrow, what would I regret? It's an intense question and it can be uncomfortable to think about, but COVID was a stark reminder for all of us that life as we know it can be turned upside down and even taken away from us at any moment."

• The speaker emphasizes the importance of considering life's impermanence and the regrets of unfulfilled dreams.

• The speaker mentions being inspired by the TV show "The Buried Life," which motivated them to create and revisit their bucket list.
• The show follows four friends on a mission to complete 100 items from their bucket lists, serving as a catalyst for the speaker to pursue their own goals.

"I was reminded of a TV show called The Buried Life, which followed four friends who set out on a mission to cross off 100 things from their bucket lists. It had inspired me to start a bucket list of my own."

• The speaker illustrates how external inspiration can lead to personal transformation and the pursuit of meaningful goals.

• Reflecting on personal goals highlighted neglected aspects of personality.
• Focus on career, wealth, and lifestyle led to unhappiness.
• Decision to live a more purposeful life by revisiting and pursuing old goals.

"Some of the goals were big and ambitious while others were simple and honestly kind of dumb, but they all really meant something to me."

• Personal goals varied in complexity but held personal significance.

"I was reminded of all these different parts of my personality that I'd been neglecting because I was so focused on career, wealth, and lifestyle, and because of that, I wasn't truly happy."

• Career and lifestyle focus led to neglect of personal fulfillment and happiness.

• Initiated a year-long project to achieve 52 bucket list items in 52 weeks.
• Initial doubts and discussions with a roommate led to the commitment.
• Aimed to look back on the year with a sense of accomplishment.

"I resolved to live a more purposeful life and dedicated the next year to deliberately pursuing those goals that had been collecting dust on my bucket list."

• Commitment to a year-long pursuit of neglected goals for personal fulfillment.

"I talked to my then-roommate and one of my best friends, Brett, and ultimately, I realized that with all the hopelessness and language going on in the world, I just wanted to be able to look back on this chapter of my life and with a soft smile say, 'Damn, what a year.'"

• Conversations with friends helped solidify the decision to embark on the project.

• Named the initiative "The What a Year Project."
• Created a structured approach to achieving goals.
• Emphasized a wide variety of goals beyond just travel and adventure.

"I knew that if I was going to take this idea seriously, I needed to put some structure around it, so I decided to name it the What a Year Project and I referred to my list as my way."

• Establishing a formal structure and name for the project to ensure commitment.

"When most folks think about a bucket list, they typically think of really epic adventures and travel, but we often forget about all the other parts of life, and my list had a wide variety."

• Highlighting the importance of including a diverse range of goals in the bucket list.

• Started with easily achievable goals to build momentum.
• Examples include a 72-hour digital detox, completing a 1,000-piece puzzle, and paying for a stranger's meal.

"I began by just doing the things that I felt I could do relatively easily on my own, like a 72-hour digital detox or completing a thousand-piece puzzle or paying for a stranger's meal."

• Initial focus on simple, manageable goals to gain confidence and progress.

• Created a website to track progress and share with friends and family.
• Used photos, audio recordings, and videos to document experiences.

"A couple of months in, I built a website so that I could track my progress and I shared it with some of my close friends and family."

• Developing a website to document and share the journey with a support network.

"Once I had this website built, I realized that I could commemorate the experiences a lot more vividly, so I started taking photos, recording audio, and I got a lot of videos too."

• Using multimedia to vividly capture and share the experiences.

• Realized the importance of involving others in achieving goals.
• Made it a requirement to invite at least one other person for each goal.

"One of the biggest indicators of successfully completing something on my list was if I had gotten at least one other person to help me out, and so I started recruiting more and more friends."

• Involving others increased the likelihood of successfully achieving goals.

"Eventually, I decided to make it a requirement that for everything I tried to cross off of my way, I would invite at least one other person."

• Formalizing the inclusion of others as a strategy to enhance success and enjoyment.

• The speaker shares experiences of failure and rejection throughout the year.
• Examples include being rejected from seven reality TV competition series and losing money in a Las Vegas gambling attempt.
• Despite not completing all goals, the speaker finds value in the experiences gained.

"This is an email from a reality TV competition series that I applied to. It's one of seven that I got rejected from."

• The speaker highlights rejection from multiple reality TV competitions, illustrating a theme of failure.

"This is a spreadsheet from the weekend in Las Vegas when my friends and I decided to try to turn a thousand dollars into ten thousand dollars within 48 hours, and as you can see, there's a lot of red on there which is not good for us."

• The speaker discusses a failed gambling attempt, symbolizing financial loss and risk-taking.

"At the end of the year, I didn't actually complete all 52 things on my list. I only got 32, which is like a D minus."

• Despite setting high goals, the speaker acknowledges falling short, emphasizing the importance of effort over perfection.

• The speaker reconnected with old friends, creating lasting memories and stories.
• The project led to unplanned but meaningful experiences.
• The speaker regained a zest for life despite the year's challenges.

"I reconnected with people that I hadn't seen in years who will now be lifelong friends."

• Reconnecting with old friends provided emotional support and strengthened relationships.

"I had experiences that I would have never imagined, some that weren't even on my bucket list to begin with."

• Unplanned experiences contributed to personal growth and joy.

"In a year that I genuinely feared could break me mentally, I ultimately found that enthusiasm for life again."

• Despite mental health struggles, the speaker found renewed passion for life.

• The speaker recognizes their privilege in having the opportunity to pursue such experiences.
• The year was difficult for many, and the speaker does not want to downplay those challenges.

"I recognize that I'm incredibly privileged and fortunate to have been able to have this experience."

• Acknowledgment of privilege highlights awareness of broader social contexts.

"I don't want to deny how incredibly difficult this past year was and still is for many of us."

• The speaker empathizes with others' struggles, showing sensitivity to collective hardships.

• The speaker shares five lessons learned from the year, aimed at helping others find happiness.

• Accepting the inevitability of death can be empowering and simplify life's priorities.
• Reflecting on personal experiences with death prompted the speaker to consider their own regrets.

"We will all die someday, and once we reconcile with the reality of our own death, I think that it can be incredibly empowering."

• Embracing mortality can lead to a more focused and meaningful life.

"I thought about when my childhood friend Bobby passed away at the age of 12 from heart complications."

• Personal loss serves as a poignant reminder of life's fragility.

"I thought about my friend Alex who took his own life at 25 even though he had so much going for him."

• The tragedy of a friend's suicide underscores the unpredictability and preciousness of life.

"I thought about my mom who just recently went into cardiac arrest after going in for surgery on her lower spine. Thankfully she did make it."

• Near-loss experiences with loved ones can profoundly impact one's perspective on life and death.

"If I were to die tomorrow, what would I regret?"

• This critical question drives the speaker to evaluate their life choices and priorities.

• The speaker emphasizes the importance of documenting personal goals and dreams, regardless of how big, shallow, abstract, or lame they may seem.

"I didn't worry too much if my goal seemed too big, too shallow, too abstract, or even just kind of lame. If it mattered to me, I..."

• Recording dreams helps in setting a clear direction and gives purpose to one's actions.

• Understand the core reasons behind your goals.
• Consider the consequences of achieving or not achieving your goals.
• Utilize tools like websites to illustrate and reinforce your purpose.

"I really tried to get to the core of why this was important to me, you know, what could happen if I actually do this thing? What will happen if I don't?"

• Reflecting on the importance of goals helps clarify motivation and potential outcomes.

"My website was a great tool for me to further illustrate my purpose behind this goal by adding in pictures, videos, quotes, and journal entries."

• Using multimedia tools can help solidify and communicate your goals more effectively.

• Share your goals with others to find support and accountability.
• Ignore negative feedback and focus on positive reinforcement.
• Building a community can lead to finding mentors, allies, and partners.

"Most people will love whatever it is that you're working on, but some people won't. Respectfully ignore the haters and lean on your supporters."

• Emphasizing the importance of focusing on supportive feedback and ignoring negativity.

"I would share my list with just about anybody who would listen, and I probably annoyed a lot of people in the process. But through that, I found allies that supported me, mentors that could coach me, and I even found partners that wanted to join in."

• Sharing your goals widely can lead to unexpected support and collaboration.

"When you loop in other people, you hold yourself accountable, things get done a lot more efficiently, and you have just a hell of a lot more fun doing it."

• Involving others increases accountability, efficiency, and enjoyment.

• Goals should be specific, measurable, attainable, realistic, and time-bound (SMART).
• Clear completion criteria help track tangible progress.

"Once you catalog your dreams, you might find that some of them are open to subjective interpretation. As in, one person might say it's been completed, while someone else would say, 'Oh no, you're not done yet.'"

• Highlighting the need for clear, objective criteria to avoid ambiguity.

"I went through an effort to try to make all of my goals smarter, where SMART is an acronym for Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, and Time-bound."

• Using the SMART framework ensures goals are well-defined and achievable.

"Not only did I have exactly 52 weeks to try to achieve 52 things, I also went through and made sure that each goal on my list had very clear yes or no completion requirements."

• Setting a clear timeline and criteria for completion helps in tracking progress effectively.

• Embrace and celebrate failures as part of the learning process.
• Viewing mistakes as steps towards success makes the journey more enjoyable.
• Focus on loving the process, not just the end result.

"It's incredibly difficult to accomplish every single one of your goals on the first try, and quite frankly, I think if you do, you're not challenging yourself enough."

• Acknowledging that failure is an essential part of challenging oneself.

"I learned to embrace failure and even celebrate it. Once you start to perceive your mistakes and rejection as just one step closer to eventual success, the whole thing becomes a lot more fun."

• Embracing failure changes the perception of the process, making it more enjoyable and productive.

"Naturally, you'll learn to love the process, not just the end result, and that's really what this is all about anyway."

• Emphasizing the importance of enjoying the journey, not just focusing on the destination.

• Start pursuing neglected goals with determination.
• Share aspirations with the community and be open to vulnerability.
• The world responds positively to proactive and shared efforts.

"My hope in sharing my story is that it'll help others finally go after some of the things that they've been neglecting on their bucket list too."

• Encouraging others to take action on their long-neglected goals.

"Too many of us wait, overanalyze, or just simply give up on the things that we've wanted to do in life."

• Identifying common barriers to pursuing goals and encouraging proactive action.

"I've experienced firsthand that if you just get started, share your aspirations with the community around you, and have the willingness to be a little bit vulnerable, you'll be amazed to see how the world responds."

• Personal testimony on the positive outcomes of starting, sharing, and being open about one's goals.

"I would love to know if you were to die tomorrow, what would you regret?"

• Provocative question to prompt reflection on unfulfilled goals and inspire immediate action.