How failure helps you succeed

In this bonus episode of Lost Boys, hosts Anthony and Professor Scott Galloway discuss the struggles and resilience of young men today, drawing from their personal experiences of overcoming financial hardships and societal expectations. They emphasize the importance of failure as a stepping stone to success and the need for a supportive community to foster growth and mental well-being. They advocate for a modern vision of masculinity that includes self-care, economic viability, and community involvement, aiming to inspire young men to find purpose and strength amidst challenges.

• Scientists who contributed to AI development are expressing concerns about its potential risks.
• There is a dichotomy in perspectives: AI as a threat vs. AI as an opportunity for abundance.
• The conversation around AI includes both fears of loss of control and hopes for a prosperous future.

"Some of the scientists who helped build AI are now sounding the alarm. I was selling AI as a great thing for decades and I was wrong."

• This quote highlights the shift in perception among AI pioneers from optimism to caution regarding AI's impact.

"There's a longer term existential threat that will arise when we create digital beings that. That are more intelligent than ourselves. We have no idea whether we can stay in control."

• The concern here is about the potential for AI to surpass human intelligence and the uncertainty of maintaining control over such entities.

"While others say that AI will usher in unfathomable abundance, I've always believed that it's going to be the most important invention that humanity will ever make."

• This quote reflects the contrasting view that AI could lead to unprecedented prosperity and be a pivotal technological advancement.

• The podcast episode focuses on personal experiences and lessons learned from failures.
• The hosts share a bond through similar upbringings and challenges faced.
• There is an emphasis on understanding and empathizing with people across different socioeconomic backgrounds.

"I feel like you've seen the whole spectrum, Scott, in terms of the income strata. You've seen your mother struggle, and now you sit here with a couple of houses and some financial independence."

• This quote underscores the journey from financial struggle to stability, providing a broad perspective on economic challenges.

"I think people fail to understand. And this is one of your great gifts, by the way... You see the whole continuum and you recognize, yeah, it may be easier and more convenient to be wealthy, but people are in a struggle no matter where they are on the income strata."

• The ability to empathize with individuals from various financial backgrounds is highlighted as a valuable trait.

• Mentorship is discussed through personal anecdotes, particularly involvement with the Big Brother program.
• The story shared illustrates the challenges faced by mentees and the impact of support.

"I'm in the Big Brother program. My big brother, my little brother is 43 today. And I'll just tell you this quick story. So I met him at 13. I helped him get through school I paid for his Catholic education."

• This quote highlights the long-term commitment and support provided through mentorship, impacting the mentee's education and life trajectory.

"My brother had a drug addiction issue. And I can remember the look on his face. He must have been 16 when I said, I can't meet with you. I'm taking my brother to drug rehab."

• The challenges faced by the mentee, including drug addiction, are acknowledged, showcasing the complexities of mentorship relationships.

• The public reaction to discussions on socioeconomic struggles is generally supportive.
• There is a positive response, particularly from mothers, to the topics raised in talks and discussions.

"People are, for the most part generally very supportive, especially lately, because this afterburner effect of mothers weighing in is really, really positive."

• The increasing support and positive feedback, especially from mothers, is noted as a significant aspect of public engagement with the topics discussed.

• The speaker grew up in financially strained circumstances, identifying as "upper lower middle class," with a household income never exceeding $40,000.
• The speaker's mother was a secretary, and the family relied on Pell Grants for education.
• There is a perception that the speaker's background is more privileged than it was, highlighting stereotypes about socioeconomic status.

"I affectionately say I was upper lower middle class. My mother lived and died as a secretary. Our household income was never above 40,000."

• This quote illustrates the speaker's modest financial background and the economic challenges faced during upbringing.

"And when people meet me, they don't assume I had a single mother and was got here on Pell Grants."

• The speaker addresses the disconnect between people's assumptions about his background and the reality of his financial struggles.

• The speaker recounts a low point during graduate school when his mother was diagnosed with cancer for the second time, and the family was underinsured.
• The speaker describes the emotional and financial challenges of caring for his ill mother, including the inability to afford necessary medical care.
• This experience was a turning point, motivating the speaker to strive for economic security and highlighting the flaws in the American healthcare system.

"My lowest moment, if I had to identify when I was in graduate school, my mom had been diagnosed with cancer for the second time."

• This quote sets the stage for the speaker's personal crisis and the challenges faced during this period.

"Nurses were 35 bucks an hour. And I had $400 in my checking account. And I thought, okay, I can afford a nurse for 12 hours."

• This quote highlights the financial strain and difficult choices the speaker faced in trying to care for his mother.

"I felt like there was a ghost following me and my mom around saying, you're not worthy."

• The speaker conveys the emotional burden and feelings of inadequacy experienced during this challenging time.

• The speaker discusses how stereotypes can influence perceptions of individuals' backgrounds and experiences.
• There is an emphasis on the lack of understanding from those who grew up with financial security about the struggles faced by those without it.
• The speaker reflects on the societal pressures and personal feelings of unworthiness tied to economic status.

"Stereotypes can work always, right?"

• This quote acknowledges the pervasive nature of stereotypes and their impact on perceptions.

"Maybe you're an empathetic, good person, but if you didn't grow up, if you grew up with money, you'll just never understand."

• The speaker highlights the gap in understanding between those who have experienced financial hardship and those who have not.

• The speaker reflects on the humiliating experience of not being able to fulfill familial obligations due to financial constraints.
• This experience served as a catalyst for personal growth and motivation to achieve economic security.
• The speaker emphasizes the importance of taking control of one's financial future despite systemic challenges.

"I wasn't living up to my obligation as a man, and it was humiliating."

• This quote underscores the speaker's feelings of inadequacy and the societal pressures tied to gender roles and financial responsibility.

"You can't decide to be economically secure, but you can decide to do everything within your power."

• The speaker conveys a message of empowerment and the importance of proactive efforts to improve one's financial situation.

• Resilience is a crucial trait in overcoming failure, which is a common aspect of pursuing success.
• Success often involves enduring numerous failures and rejections before achieving significant wins.
• Personal experiences of repeated failure can fuel determination and persistence in the long run.

"My success can be distilled to one word, failure. And that is my willingness to endure failure. Yeah. One out of seven companies succeed. So I started nine and guess what? I've had two wins. But you know what? That's all you need."

• This quote emphasizes the importance of resilience and the acceptance of failure as a stepping stone to success. It highlights that enduring failure is critical to eventually achieving success.

• Personal challenges and early life experiences can shape one's motivation and drive.
• Experiencing financial instability in childhood can lead to a lifelong drive to succeed and avoid similar situations.
• Overcoming academic and professional setbacks can build resilience and fuel future success.

"My dad got his hours cut. I was 12 years old... He came home violent because he is completely out of control of his financial circumstance... I remember that anxiety like it was yesterday and I think it still fuels me today."

• The speaker reflects on a significant childhood experience of financial instability, which instilled a lasting sense of anxiety and motivation to succeed.

• Experiencing academic failure does not necessarily preclude future success; setbacks can be overcome with determination and alternative strategies.
• Professional challenges, such as being fired, can be pivotal moments that redirect career paths and lead to eventual success.
• Re-entering a previous workplace after being fired can provide a unique perspective on personal growth and career development.

"I failed differential calculus in high school... I went to see my guidance counselor and he said, okay, you can take a summer course... they erased the failing grade and they replaced it with the grade that I got in the summer course."

• This quote illustrates how academic setbacks can be addressed through persistence and alternative solutions, ultimately not hindering long-term success.

"I got fired from Goldman Sachs... I eventually got rehired into Goldman, so it didn't look like I got fired, but I got fired."

• The speaker recounts a professional setback of being fired and then rehired, highlighting resilience and the ability to navigate career challenges.

• Not fitting into a specific work environment can be a sign to pursue independent ventures or entrepreneurship.
• Career challenges can drive individuals to start their own businesses and find environments where they can thrive.
• Support systems may not always be available, necessitating self-reliance and independent problem-solving.

"I never fit in at Goldman... I had to go start my own business."

• This quote reflects the speaker's realization that not fitting into a particular workplace led to pursuing entrepreneurship, highlighting the importance of finding the right career path.

"When you're getting your butt kicked at age 25, you got to know where to go, man... I couldn't call my dad... he couldn't supply me with a white collar strategy for my white collar job."

• The speaker emphasizes the need for self-reliance and independent problem-solving when facing career challenges, especially when traditional support systems are unavailable.

• The educational system is described as fractured, highlighting a need for effective mentoring and guidance.
• Success is attributed to good mentoring, strong education, self-will, resilience, and the ability to learn from failure.
• The importance of role models is emphasized, especially for individuals lacking parental guidance.

"You know, the educational system's fractured. You got there, I got there. We're the product of good mentoring, good education, self will and resilience."

• The quote highlights the necessity of mentorship and personal qualities like resilience in overcoming the limitations of a flawed educational system.

"Yeah, I don't have a good role model. My father left my mom. I don't even know who he is, but this guy's working his ass off."

• This quote underscores the impact of observing hardworking role models as a substitute for absent parental figures.

• Discusses the importance of addressing mental health issues such as loneliness and suicidal ideation.
• Emphasizes the need for advocacy and support systems to help individuals feel loved, wanted, and purposeful.
• Questions how to create a culture that supports young males in seeking help and finding purpose.

"It's okay to provide advocacy for yourself and feel advocated for. And oh, by the way, if you feel like shit or you're lonely or you're experiencing suicide ideation, which has got to be the worst possible thing on this planet, frankly."

• The quote stresses the importance of self-advocacy and the need for a supportive culture to address severe mental health challenges.

• The concept of concentric circles is used to describe the progression from personal well-being to community involvement.
• Emphasizes the importance of taking care of oneself first to be able to support family and eventually the broader community.
• Highlights the ultimate expression of masculinity as contributing to the future, even if one does not directly benefit.

"You got to take care of yourself. You got to be strong, you got to be economically viable, you got to be mentally fit. You fix your own oxygen mask before trying to affix someone else's."

• This quote illustrates the foundational principle of self-care as a prerequisite for being able to help others effectively.

"The ultimate expression of masculinity is to plant the trees, the shade of which you'll never sit under."

• The quote conveys the idea of selfless contribution to future generations as the highest form of masculine achievement.

• Discusses the responsibility of those who are successful to help others in their community achieve economic stability.
• Provides an example of improving an individual's economic situation by offering better employment with benefits.

"I got him out of clamming. He's making four times his salary with healthcare benefits. And Skybridge is paying for IVF, okay, to help him create a family."

• This quote exemplifies how providing opportunities can significantly improve someone's quality of life and future prospects.

• Proposes a modern, aspirational vision of masculinity focused on self-care, family support, and community involvement.
• Encourages redefining masculinity to include nurturing and supporting others beyond one's immediate circle.

"Well, I think it comes back to trying to come up with a more modern, aspirational vision of masculinity."

• This quote calls for a reevaluation of traditional masculine ideals to include broader, more inclusive responsibilities.